Ordinary Joe has few star qualities

11:03am Thursday 18th September 2008

The interior of Chutney Joe’s in Chingford was almost as dimly lit as the dark night outside.

The walls were all a shade of pink or cream and it was lit by side lamps attached to the walls rather than one big light hanging from the ceiling.

While I think the owners feel this may create a feeling of intimacy, I distinctly got a feeling of faded grandeur and this was heightened by the peeling paintwork on the walls.

There are plenty of Indian artefacts positioned around the restuarant which are reflected in the mirrors which add a blend of authenticity.

I was quickly shown to a table which was clearly reserved. But the sign was brushed aside quickly and I was told I might have to play musical chairs if the hungry diners who had staked their table showed up. Fortunately, this did not happen.

A fellow reviewer once remarked that you can tell a lot about a curry house by the quality of poppadoms and pickles it serves.

If this is the case then Chutney Joe failed that test miserably.

The poppadoms were tasteless and it felt like munching air while the mango chutney was sweet and insipid, the yoghurt a bit gooey, and the chopped onions overpoweringly flavoured with garlic. Definitely not worth the money.

Fortunately the bottle of Kingfisher was very refreshing but £3.25 – quite pricey for this part of London. For my main course I ordered a mixed grill which consisted of a kebab, chopped pieces of lamb and chicken and a chicken leg cooked on a tandoor (£12.95).

I also ordered a motor poneer side dish which consists of peas and cheese cooked in a creamy sauce (£3.95).

While I waited I was occasionally distracted by the flickering TV in front of me which was set to the Indian version of MTV.

Diners waiting for their food can wile away the time by watching scantily clad Indian models dance with chubby male popstars in Chingford no less!

Although only half full, you get a lot of time to contemplate life’s important issues while waiting for your meal at Chutney Joe.

When it did arrive it sizzled on a bed of cooked onions and smelt delicious.

The kebab was excellently cooked and in my opinion the best of the meat dishes.

It was succulent and was not too tough or spicy. However both the lamb and the chicken pieces were a bit bland and disappointing.

The chicken leg proved to be the biggest let-down as it was fatty and the meat was difficult to cut because it was tough.

However a special mention must be made for the naan, which was free with the mixed grill. It was buttery and tasty.

The service was functional rather than friendly and rather like the restaurant itself.

Chutney Joe is a chain restaurant but I think quality chains can and should still offer something different at each outlet.